Would you call yourself a forgiving person? I think everyone generally would answer “yes”.
Now let’s get personal with forgiveness. Are you forgiving with those closest to you that have caused you heartache and pain? A spouse, a friend, a family member? Forgiveness looks a little different when we’re dealing with our own personal hurts.
I have talked to so many women in my career who have shared that they just couldn’t forgive someone close to them. They go through the motions but they have a mental list of all the hurts, all the words that have wounded them and they bring out that list over and over again.
They are never truly free from their wounds.
It’s a hard thing to forgive sometimes….but when we understand that forgiving is a gift you are giving yourself, you will see why it’s worth pursuing.
When you are withholding forgiving someone it can cause bitterness to take root without you even realizing it. The fact that you rehearse what has been done to you, or even worse, remind the person what they have done to you, gives a picture into your heart. God has limited room to work because of what you’re holding onto.
With true forgiveness, there are no reminders, no rehearsals, no accusations. With yourself and with those who have hurt you. That is how God forgives. The hurts never have to raise up again in your life. The enemy of our souls will try to use it again. Oh, will he ever! To be a free woman, this needs to be conquered once and for all.
Trying to live your life while still holding onto a ball and chain of unforgiveness eventually cripples you.
Something I say to myself when I’m really struggling to forgive someone who has hurt me is “To the measure of which I have been forgiven, I will choose to forgive”. That measure is God’s forgiveness toward me. It’s called grace. His amazing grace.
God has forgiven me and has forgiven you. For everything. For every word, for every sin, for every wrong doing, and he NEVER remembers it again.
When that fact makes it from your head to your heart, freedom, and healing will come.
It’s still easier said than done because hurts hurt. That’s why we can’t do it on our own. We need God’s help. We have to admit we are struggling with forgiveness. No brushing it aside. Be honest. It’s a sin in your life that has to be reckoned with. The beautiful, amazing thing is God can truly change your heart. With His help, you can finally let go of those past hurts and step into freedom and be who you were destined to be.
Ask God today to help you forgive. To forgive yourself. To forgive others. You may have to ask daily because forgiving is a God thing. Only He can erase the hurts, uproot the anger of what has been done or said to you. Take the steps to forgive and finally be free from the weight of unforgiveness. Christ came so you could be free. Let us walk and live in that freedom.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:32)
Until next time,
~pat
